“How can I have an NDE?” one woman asked.
I suppose people are always searching for something else, an alternative to our existence, something better, more meaningful.
NDEs sound so appealing to some.
Based on the research I’ve done, I tell them, “Be careful. Having an NDE is serious business. Know this: NDEs come with a hefty price tag.
This is not just a simple matter of an NDE boosting dormant ambitions. It’s not a reversible thrill-ride and it’s certainly not a ‘walk in the park’. The experience entails permanent separation to another realm and there’s no turning back. In most cases, it involves nearly dying.
And that’s not the least of it. There are problems when experiencers return—problems that can’t be corrected. A NDE can bring on baffling, frightening and even dangerous after-effects. If you listen to an account of a personal journey, you’ll hear one story but if you peek behind the curtain, you’ll hear another.
I talked to men and women who spent years trying to adapt to this new world they were thrust into. On average, it takes experiencers seven years to adapt to the changes brought about from an NDE.
One after another, experiencers related to me how they quit their jobs, left their spouses, contemplated suicide, embarked on self-destructive behavior and questioned their lives afterwards.
Physical trauma—chilling enough—is only one aspect of the experience. The emotional and mental burden afterwards is where things gets sticky.
Most experiencers return with a sense of isolation. They have changed to their core. And it’s not the kind of trauma one easily adapt to. It fundamentally reprograms you. There’s no way to get back to the old way. No how-to books to consult. No magic pill to take.
A lot of experiencers feel isolated after the event. You can’t really tell your friends or family you went to heaven or met God or had a conversation with your dead grandmother, or that you now get psychic messages and see dead people. That’s when the conversation stops.
Then there’s the matter of your spouse. You stop eating the types of food they prepared. You no longer want to watch that favorite television show. You don’t tell them that when you go shopping and you’re standing in line, you know what everyone else in line is thinking. You learn to keep your mouth shut. Your spouse asks what’s wrong and tells you, “If you only stayed the way you were, we’d be fine.” But you can’t. It’s impossible. 65% of NDErs get divorced, according to one study at the University of North Texas.
The people you love refuse to accept what you are telling them. That’s common.
Then there’s the issue of mission. Many NDEers know they were given a purpose during their NDE, but don’t remember what it is. The more fortunate ones recall and, if they’re lucky, it’s a mission easily applied on earth: music, art, a form of healing. But for many, they have no idea what they are supposed to do now. All they know is they’re supposed to do something, but darn if they can figure out what it is.
Many spend years wandering, struggling with life purpose. Other’s criss-cross the country, seeking an unfathomable answer. Some take odd jobs. Or no jobs at all. Many experience money problems. They think the next place will provide a solution to their very deep dilemma. Many never find the answers they are seeking.